First entry

I’ve decided to start this journal because there seem to be many ‘slave journals’ around, but very few owner or Mistress/Master journals. It’s quite common for a slave to be ordered to keep a journal, to enable their owner to arrive at a better understanding of them. I wanted to show the other side of the coin.

Also, writing things down is a good way of distilling thoughts and bringing a rational perspective to your life. Although I have ‘kink-aware’ friends that I trust, I don’t like to talk about my private thoughts and feelings to others, not least because they involve my slave, for whom I am responsible. He gave up all rights to any privacy when he became my slave, so it is my responsibility to safeguard that privacy as I see fit. Therefore, the anonymity of this journal allows Mistress to vent while still protecting her property! :-)

Throughout this journal I will use the phrase ‘M-type’ when referring to a Master or Mistress, rather than the more longwinded and awkward ‘Mistress/Master’.

Had a really bad night last night – couldn’t seem to sleep, and I don’t know why! I kept waking up with my ear squashed painfully against my pillow – weird! Guineapig had a restless night too, sitting up for hours doing brain puzzles and hardly getting any sleep. Sometimes he sleeps well, and at other times his brain tends to race and he just can’t settle.

We don’t live with each other yet – we are in the process of a gradual relocation, which will arrive at a milestone in a few weeks time when we move the office to my city. Guineapig owned his own business before we met; although technically all his property is now my property, I still delegate most of the running of the business to him, as he has the specialist knowledge. However, right from the start of our relationship he has always asked me about work-related strategies and decisions, and I take an active role in the business. This is what he does half-time; the other half of the time he works for another company. Being very independent by nature, he absolutely hates ‘working for a boss’. Not as odd as it sounds – many people (in fact I’m even prepared to hazard a guess and say the majority) who are ‘submissive’ in the D/s sense will only submit to one person.

His relocation will finally conclude in the middle of July. These arrangements suit me well, as it allows us to make the transition in a gradual way. I already have 24/7 ownership of him, a great deal of daily contact, and do not hesitate to make full use of him; nevertheless, living together will shift the dynamic. We both hope for a stricter framework in the not-too-distant future, but guineapig has a tendency to bite off more than he can chew, reminding me sometimes of a dog pulling hard at the leash! Myself, I’ve no liking for ‘rules’ for their own sake, but only when they help to achieve something, whether that be a concrete accomplishment or simply getting the slave into the desired headspace.

He’s also got a dodgy stomach at the moment, which he’s had for quite a while – a matter of months. This bothers me, as I want my property to be in good condition, and evidently something is wrong. He has made an appointment to be checked out, though, so all I can do is keep my fingers crossed at the moment.

Boy am I tired! Had quite a few bad nights recently and they’re catching up with me. =_=